Wednesday, July 20, 2011

CapitAl Hill

By Dante De Navarre

It's time to take back our government from double-dipping politicians and give it to the real citizens: Corporations.

What's it Going to Take?
How in the world are we ever going to fix the most dire, pressing dilemma of our time: Corporate Poverty, and the almost complete absence of Corporate representation in Washington?

Let's Elect Corporations!

Now is our chance, as a free nation, to finally eliminate the useless middleman! Now is the time to end the most notorious bigotry and discrimination in history, and proclaim from the rooftops: Corporations are people too!

Look at the time and effort, not to mention money, wasted in the elaborate pretense of campaigns and elections for a phony representative democracy. Why should We the Corporations have to pay a single dime in bribes to Representatives and Senators who already get an allowance from the taxpayers? All they do, at best, is rubber-stamp what corporations want, and at worst, try to water down corporate will with pricey bells and whistles. Why pay for that? If we could just grow up a little bit, put away our childish toys like the Constitution and accept the things we cannot change, we could save the rich untold billions more, and that is the name of the game, n'est pas?

Appoint Corporations Directly to Government!

Imagine the incredible streamlining of government operations, the efficiency, the clarity!

Ask the corporations which seats they want. Let them pick the committees to chair. Goldman for Finance. KBR for Defense. Exxon for Energy. Let them appoint cabinet and agency heads. Facebook for State. Walmart for Commerce. Bank of America for HUD. ConAgra for Agriculture. Blackwater/Xe for Justice. Monsanto for FDA. Koch for EPA. And let's not forget to allow full participation by both the Religion and Prison Industry sectors, two of the fastest growing Amerikan success stories.

No More Gridlock!

Gone would be the endless partisan bickering, the political posturing of pretending to be a champion of the poor unborn on one side, a champion of the born poor on the other, when none of those insects really matter! The belittled, embattled and embittered Legislature could finally be Free! After putting an end to all the acrimony over campaign donations, accusations of corruption and boring fund-raising dinners they will finally, gratefully, cobwebs clearing, muscles flexing, all stand together and with one clear, resounding voice pass laws like bolts of greased lightning, ending at long last our shameful dependence on domestic jobs, our spineless addiction to peace, our crippling health, environmental and financial regulations, our foolish infatuation with alternative energy, our greedy desire to tax the rich, our irresponsible handouts to small, useless people who are not corporations, the list goes on and on...

Capitol Hill can finally come out of the closet and proudly proclaim its true self, Capital Hill.

More of Mr. De Navarre's work may be found at OpEd News

No comments: